Relationships Will Transform Your Life

By Justin Stoddart

I’ve spent years teaching real estate professionals how to build businesses through relationships and referrals. It’s something I believe in deeply. But recently, I’ve had an experience that’s reminded me just how powerful those relationships can be, and how much opportunity we leave on the table when we don’t take the time to develop them.

What’s been particularly interesting is that this reminder didn’t come from a business conference, a coaching session, or a conversation about real estate. It came from an unexpected responsibility in my personal life.

A few weeks ago, I was asked to serve as the bishop of my local church congregation. It’s a volunteer position that requires a significant commitment of time, much of it spent serving and getting to know the people in our community.

One of my mentors encouraged me to visit every family in the congregation during my first three months. I took that advice to heart, and I’ve been spending several evenings a week sitting in people’s living rooms, learning about their lives, their challenges, and their aspirations.

Here’s what surprised me: I’ve lived among many of these people for twelve years. I thought I knew them. But spending an hour in someone’s home, genuinely interested in their story, has shown me how much I didn’t know.

Despite an incredibly demanding schedule, I don’t think I’ve ever been happier. And it’s reinforced something that I believe every real estate professional needs to understand.

The Opportunity Isn’t Always in Meeting More People

In real estate, we’re constantly encouraged to expand our networks, generate more leads, and find new prospective clients. And while there’s certainly a place for those activities, I wonder how often we’re overlooking the relationships we’ve already established.

Think about the people in your professional network. How many do you genuinely know? How many understand what you’re trying to accomplish? And perhaps more importantly, how many would feel comfortable putting their reputation on the line to introduce you to someone important?

There’s a principle I frequently teach called the upstream model. The idea is that the people you already know likely have relationships with many of the people you’re trying to reach. You may only be one or two introductions away from your next significant opportunity.

But those introductions rarely happen through superficial relationships. People open doors for individuals they know, trust, and genuinely care about.

I experienced this firsthand recently when I reconnected with a friend I’ve known for thirty years. We’ve maintained a relationship since serving together in Brazil, and when I shared what we’re building at Pro Insight, he immediately recognized several opportunities.

Within one conversation, he identified three companies that could benefit from our platform and offered to introduce me to several potential investors.

That’s five or six meaningful opportunities from one conversation. Not because I had a clever prospecting script or purchased access to someone’s contact information, but because we’d invested in a relationship over time.

For real estate professionals who are frustrated with the expense and uncertainty of purchased leads, I think there’s an important lesson here. Before spending more money trying to reach strangers, consider whether you’ve fully developed the relationships with people who already know and trust you.

Build Relationships With People Who Can Open Doors for Others

There’s another dimension to this that I believe is especially relevant to building a sustainable real estate business.

Your network shouldn’t consist exclusively of past clients and prospective buyers and sellers. Some of your most valuable relationships will be with other professionals who serve those same people.

Mortgage professionals, financial advisors, moving companies, estate planning attorneys, and other trusted service providers already have established relationships with individuals who may need your expertise.

When you build meaningful connections with these professionals, you create opportunities to serve people through an existing foundation of trust.

But the approach matters.

I’m not suggesting that you schedule a meeting with every professional in your community and immediately ask them for referrals. Instead, become genuinely interested in their business. Understand what they’re working toward, what challenges they’re facing, and who they would benefit from knowing.

Then look for opportunities to help.

Recently, I spoke with two professionals in Vancouver, Washington. One is a real estate agent named Harris, and the other is Peter, who owns a moving company. Both were enthusiastic about their businesses despite the challenges many people are experiencing in the housing market.

I recognized that they shared a similar outlook and could potentially benefit from knowing one another, so I connected them.

It wasn’t complicated. A couple of phone conversations and a text introduction were all it took.

This is what I mean when I encourage professionals to become relationship builders. You’re not simply maintaining a database of contacts. You’re actively looking for opportunities to make the people around you more successful.

Over time, those relationships become a powerful source of referrals, introductions, and opportunities that would be difficult to create on your own.

The People Around You Shape What’s Possible

One of the things I appreciated most about my conversation with Harris was his perspective on the market.

While many agents are discouraged by current conditions, Harris sees opportunity. He recognizes that when other professionals become distracted by negativity, there’s an opportunity to identify motivated clients and serve them exceptionally well.

His outlook makes even more sense when you understand his background. Harris grew up in Bosnia during a time of conflict, when playing outside could mean wearing a helmet to protect himself from falling debris caused by nearby explosions.

That experience shaped how he sees adversity.

I think there’s something important here about the people we choose to surround ourselves with.

If your professional conversations constantly revolve around how difficult the market is, how unfair the circumstances are, or why business isn’t what it used to be, those conversations will inevitably influence your thinking.

But when you spend time with people who are actively looking for ways to serve, grow, and create opportunity, you begin to see possibilities that others overlook.

And when you combine that mindset with a genuine commitment to helping others, something remarkable happens. Your relationships become more productive, certainly, but they also become more meaningful.

That’s what I’ve experienced in these recent weeks of visiting families in my congregation. The more time I spend learning about people and looking for ways to serve them, the more fulfilled I feel.

It’s changed the way I think about success.

For much of my life, I’ve associated progress with reaching the next milestone, whether that’s a bigger home, a better vacation, or another professional achievement. There’s nothing inherently wrong with those things. But I’m increasingly convinced that the deepest satisfaction comes from the people we help along the way.

Build a Business That Makes Your Life Better

If you’re a real estate professional who’s been struggling to generate consistent referrals, I’d encourage you to reconsider where you’re investing your time.

Rather than immediately looking for another lead source, identify a handful of people already in your network whom you could get to know better. Schedule a conversation without an agenda to sell anything. Ask thoughtful questions. Learn what matters to them, and find one meaningful way to contribute to their success.

Then make that behavior a consistent part of how you operate.

At ProInsight, we help professionals turn these kinds of relationships into scalable, transferable referral businesses through strategic channel partnerships. We host network of trusted professionals who consistently create opportunities for one another, rather than relying entirely on your personal prospecting efforts.

But I want to emphasize that the benefits extend well beyond production numbers.

When you build your business around genuine relationships and service, you create something that can be both financially sustainable and personally fulfilling.

That’s the kind of business I want to help more people build, and it’s the kind of life I’m increasingly committed to living.

If you’re ready to build a more predictable, relationship-driven real estate business, I invite you to explore what we’re doing at ProInsight. Let’s help you develop the professional partnerships that can open new doors for your business while allowing you to make a meaningful difference in the lives of the people around you.

At ProInsight, we help professionals build a referral engine for their business. Apply here to see if becoming a Homeowner Concierge™ Select Professional is available in your area.