By Justin Stoddart

Introduction

If you’re asking, “How do I get more referrals?”, you’re asking the wrong question. Instead, you should be asking, “Who should I be getting referrals from?” This shift in mindset—moving from how to who—is what separates struggling professionals from those who have a steady stream of high-quality referrals.

At ProInsight, we believe that referral-based growth isn’t about chasing leads—it’s about building strategic relationships. The key is to surround yourself with the right professionals who serve the same clients as you, in a similar way. Let’s dive into how you can implement this approach and create an endless pipeline of quality referrals.

The “Who, Not How” Mindset

Originating from the book Who Not How by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy, this principle is a game-changer. Instead of focusing on how to do everything yourself, focus on who can help you achieve your goals faster.

When it comes to referrals, it’s not just about who your clients are—it’s about who else serves those same clients. Think about professionals in complementary industries. If you’re a real estate agent, a mortgage lender who works with the same type of clientele is a natural fit. If you’re a financial advisor, estate attorneys and CPAs should be on your radar.

But here’s the crucial part: it’s not enough to simply work with the same clients. The client experience must align. A luxury real estate agent should partner with a lender who serves high-net-worth individuals, ensuring a seamless transition in service quality.

Identifying the Right Referral Partners

Before you can build strategic referral relationships, you need to understand where you stand in the marketplace. At ProInsight, we help professionals identify their positioning using a 16-quadrant matrix as part of our Deep Dive. Most professionals we work with are above the midline in price and lean towards being relationship-driven rather than purely transactional.

Once you know who you are, you can start identifying:
✅ Professionals who serve the same clientele
✅ Those who deliver a similar level of service and experience

This is where the magic happens. When you partner with the right professionals, your clients benefit from a smooth, high-quality experience across industries.

The Biggest Referral Mistake (and How to Avoid It)

Too many professionals approach referral relationships with their hand out, eager to get referrals. But the secret to long-term success is to give first. Approach referral partners the right way:

1. Be Curious About Their Business
   Instead of talking about yourself, ask them:

   • Tell me about your business and how you serve your clients.
   • What would success look like for you in the next year?
   • What challenges might you face in reaching those goals?

2. Find Ways to Add Value
   Once you understand their goals, offer support. Can you introduce them to someone who can help? Share insights? Provide resources? This approach makes you memorable and builds trust.

3. Teach Each Other How to Give Great Referrals
   After you’ve built rapport, schedule a follow-up meeting and say:

   • I’d love to walk you through my client experience so you know exactly how I serve my clients.
   • At what point in my process would it make sense to introduce you?

This naturally encourages them to ask the same about your business, creating a strong, mutually beneficial referral partnership.

Your Next Steps

To put this strategy into action, make two lists:

1. Professionals You Already Know – Who in your network aligns with your approach to business? Reach out and start conversations using the framework above.
2. Professionals You Need to Meet – If there are key industries missing from your network, ask your best clients for introductions. A warm introduction dramatically increases the likelihood of a successful partnership.

If you’re serious about leveling up your referral game, ProInsight can help. Learn More about how platform is designed to make strategic networking and referrals seamless, so you can focus on growing your business through meaningful relationships.

At ProInsight, we’re here to empower you to reach new heights. Let’s think bigger together.